Monday, September 8, 2008

On malaysian drivers skills

Its monday morning
and I hate mondays
.
.
.
.
Need to bitch a little bit

First of all I dont know what I ate a couple of nites ago but my stomach is aching. I dont think its due to gastric response coz why only now?? Feels like something is biting the lower bit of the tummy. This is also causing my stomach to be hideously bloating. MCB.

For some reason today there were more idiots on the motorcycle lane.
Ada yang slow macam siput babi,
ada yg bawak macam dia punya jalan.

translation
There were some as slow as pig snails,
and there were some who ride like they own the road.

To the freaking slow brahders,
please
please
please
keep to the left most as possible. Did you learn this while taking your bike exam 200 years ago?
I dont think you did. And I doubt if you bribed your examinor because its not possible when you take your motorcycle licence.

FYI In Malaysia we practice paying a little sum (read= bribe) of money to your driving examininor so that you can pass the exam and obtain a licence to drive like a typical asian driver (read =No brains but still wanna drive cars).

To foreigners reading this please dont be alarmed, in Malaysia we practice the motto "Malaysia Boleh!"
Translation = "anything goes!"



Juneo's guide to negotiating a roundabout.
Did you know that you cannot enter a roundabout when there are cars on it towards your right hand side?
In cases where there are heavy traffic, you MUST GIVE WAY TO THOSE ON YOUR RIGHT OF THE ROUNDABOUT.

(stupid woman this morning completely ignored this rule. If I didnt give way to her, I will be dead already because I'm on a bike and god forbid the bitch to notice anyone on two wheels even though I have shown my intentions by using my indicators. Do you know what that is? Its the levers on the left or right of your steering wheel. No they arent chopsticks you dim wit)


Imagine 3 lanes entering a roundabout.
The right lane is used when you want to do a 3 oclock turn and a 6 oclock turn.
The middle lane is used when you want to do a 12 oclock or 3 oclock.
The left lane is used ONLY FOR 9 OCLOCK TURNS!
why cant you understand that you dumb Malaysians?

Tell me why would you enter from the left lane, to do a 6 oclock turn?????
Notice the roundabout has 3 lanes ENTERING, 2 lanes ON the roundabout.
3 ----> 2???
Therefore if you are on the left most lane you cannot be using the roundabout other than to turn left. Kan nin na bu eh.
If I had 1 single superhero ability it is to banish all imcompetent drivers on the road.

No comments: